SOUTH WALK - Swanning along - a nice Sunday stroll

Sunday 14th September - woke up early at my dodgy accommodation in Weymouth. Breakfast wasn't part of the deal - so got up early, cleared out of the room and made my way to the Esplanade. It was another beautiful morning - and I found a beachside cafe where I was delighted to see that Bacon Rolls were on the menu. Unfortunately, I was too early and the cooker wasn't turned on!!

I could have suggested that now might be a good time to turn it on, but bit my tongue and had a healthy energy bar instead. Found out the best place to catch a bus to Portland and was soon standing at the Ferrybridge Inn, the intersection between Portland and the coast path, East and West. I wasn't best pleased to discover that I had left my Map (in it's splendid waterproof map carrier case) on the damn bus seat. I knew I wouldn't see it again, I had ruined the Bus Drivers day by giving him a tenner for a £1.20 fare. He wasn't a happy bunny - cleared him right out of change. So seeing my map on the seat would have pleased him no end.

Anyway - today, I was heading for Abbotsbury - a straightforward 10 mile walk which mostly followed the edge of the Fleet lagoon, a shallow area of saline water which lies behind the bank of pebbles along Chesil Beach. The lagoon is an important conservation area and haven for birds.

It was a pleasant walk if not spectacular and on such a nice day, there were plenty of other walkers. Met a very nice couple blackberry picking who lived nearby and were moaning about how many people there were! They were the archetypal Lord and Lady of the Manor, but very pleasant and wished me good luck on my travels.

After about 6 miles - the path started to head inland in a loop which would end at Abbotsbury. I was putting my foot down, as I knew there was a bus I could catch at 13:21 from Abbotsbury. As it turned out - I got there with 10 minutes to spare - so was quite pleased with that. The path ended at the entrance to the famous Abbotsbury Swannery, from where I headed up to the village.

The last time I visited Abbotsbury, it was with my friend Michael (F1 Dodgy knee) Ricketts. A couple of days later, the Swannery was hit by Bird Flu. You can draw your own conclusions.

Although I had timed it perfectly for the bus , unfortunately it was then 40 minutes late! During which time, I could have eaten a Sunday Roast and downed a well earned Lager. Instead, I ended up spending the best part of an hour having to listen to a couple of simpletons who joined me at the Bus Stop. It became apparent, that they were brother and sister. She looked "simple" - he looked like an Axe wielding maniac. The conversation went like this :

Him " Why have you got a Bus Pass, I don't agree with it, I haven't got a Bus Pass, if I asked for one they would say drop dead and eff off, so why have you got one. In all my 41 years on this earth I've never known anyone who doesn't pay for a bus, I don't agree with it, if I asked for one, they'd say drop dead and Eff off." Her " Mum's got one" Him I've never known anything like it, don't go on about it, I'll throw the bloody thing in the sea, I will, I'm not joking, in all my 41 years, I've never known anything like it. I wish I'd never come on this holiday, I'd rather be at home in Weston. Where's the Bus - there should be a bus every 5 minutes this time of year . Why have you got a Bus Pass and not me, don't go on about it, because it will end up in the sea, If I asked for one they'd say drop dead and Eff off " Her "Mum's got one" Him " I've never ever waited so long for a bus - in all my 41 years on this earth, I've never waited this long for a bus, there should be one every 10 minutes this time of year. Why should you not pay for the bus, I have to pay, everyone has to pay, why don't you pay, in all my 41 years, I've never known anything like it, if I asked for one they'd say drop dead and Eff off. Where's the bus, there should be one every 10 minutes this time of year. I've never waited so long for a bus...........

I haven't exaggerated any of that and was rapidly losing the will to live when the bus did turn up. I sat myself down and they proceeded to plonk themselves right next to me - I thought I'd better move otherwise I couldn't guarantee that there would be a 42nd year of his life!

I was soon back in Weymouth, got back to the car and made my way home. I'd covered another 26 miles. Now it's time to get back up to the North coast - to my last end point, Lynmouth, from where I will head for Combe Martin, along what is meant to be one of the best bit of North Devon's coast.

I'll keep you posted!